The Girl on the Train: Get Emily Some Chapstick

Based on Paula Hawkin’s New York Times bestseller, The Girl on the Train was one of 2016’s most anticipated movies. I’ll go verdict first on this movie adaptation: don’t see it. Maybe if you are bored on airplane (or a train for that matter), check it out. I’ve enjoyed Emily Blunt’s work over the years.…

“The Nice Guys” Movie Review

It must be quite cheap to produce movies set in the 1970’s, as we seem to be seeing a lot of them. You take a bunch of props left from American Hustle, all the polyester on sale at Goodwill, blow up a few old Chevy Impalas and you have a fun detective/crime story set in…

“Captain America: Civil War”: Movie Review

And here comes Jeremy Renner with his trusty bow and arrow … The Avengers writers must hate Jeremy Renner. The 13th movie in the Marvel Cinematic Universe has a plethora of characters and action—each superhero one upping the other—and they always trot out Jeremy Renner with his bow and arrow. It looks so weak against…

Jungle Book Movie Review: A Tale of 2 Jungle Books

Disney’s revamped quasi live-action Jungle Book is the harbinger of an era of hyper realistic animation. Hopefully they make more films like this, but part of me thinks this technology might serve nefarious purposes as well. The images look so realistic now that without my contact lenses I might even mistake them for real images (except…

Barbershop The Next Cut: Sitcom in Waiting

The thing that most impressed me from Barbershop 3: The Next Cut was Ice Cube’s business acumen, because I imagine Cube and the other producers made a quite a bit of money off this. Cube filmed this on (I’m sorry to say) a sort of cheap looking set of a barbershop, but the camera makes sure…

The Boss: Trailer Affliction

I wish movie theaters had an plan like Hulu where you could pay an extra $5 and get a trailer-free movie experience. I schedule meticulously to time my arrival at movie theaters expressly to avoid trailers of movies I want to see. In the case of some comedies, you have seen 3/4 of the best…

Bat Man v Superman: Was It That Bad?

By now you might have heard that critics have savaged Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice (currently 29% on Rotten Tomatoes), and despite this Warner Bros. can make it rain on the haters. At time of writing, the movie has already brought in half a billion in box office receipts worldwide. Which goes to show that even…

“10 Cloverfield Lane” Movie Review

Every family has one. You see it all the time on Facebook and other social media: the conspiracy theorist. Whether they are 9-11 Truthers or trying to convince you about FEMA camps, almost everyone has that one outspoken friend or relative that you simply KNOW has a bunker built in their backyard complete with iodine…

“The Witch” Movie Review: The Devil You Know

Puritan New England doesn’t look like it was very much fun. The fashion is a disaster. The log cabins are drafty. And remember toilet paper hadn’t been invented yet. The setting of the movie The Witch reminded me of the camping trips from Boy Scouts that I hated, because I’m basically the human version of…

“Deadpool”: The Vanity of It All

Deadpool tells the tale of a snarky titular superhero (Ryan Reynolds), and the R-rated humor keeps you laughing the whole way through. Buoyed by great word of mouth, I went to this pic which I might have otherwise skipped, because I’d rather drill a hole in my head than watch another superhero franchise movie. I…