Home I.G. Advice I.G. Advice: The Pain of Parting With Donkey-Rigged Suitor

I.G. Advice: The Pain of Parting With Donkey-Rigged Suitor


Dear Charles:

I am a woman in my early 32, and I need advice. How do I dump a 22 year-old stud with the biggest cock I’ve ever seen. Serious. Help. I’m loving it, but he really is just too young.

Love, Le Petit Devil in Las Vegas


Dear Devil,

What seems to be the problem here? You should just ride that white pony as far as it will take you. OK, maybe not. I see where you are coming from. I understand the appeal of a mega-hung studhorse. If you are into well-endowed, meeting a guy with a crotch python is like finding the Holy Grail or Lost City of Atlantis or something.

To use another metaphor, your situation is a bit like catching some elusive swordfish worth millions of dollars only to find out the fish is way too young and having to throw it back in the ocean. Break ups suck, and considering this isn’t really his fault, you might let him down as easily as possible. It is funny how ageing works: 22 to 32 is a challenge, while 32 and 42 is not that big a deal at all. Waiting for a man/boy of 22  to grow out of X-Box and comic books (I am only guessing) really is a deal breaker for a lot of people, though.

I figure if you keep answering his texts saying you are “busy” eventually he will get the drift and move on. Or tell him you made a new boyfriend. That usually does the trick since it something the other person cannot change.

So throw your swordfish back to sea. I am sure there will be plenty of takers.

Send questions about life, love or something random to charukyu@gmail.com or just use the “Ask Something” tab up above!  Also, I highly recommend you buy my book on AmazonBarnes & Noble or Smashwords. Everybody is talking about it!! Beijos!

(Image via flickrCC)