Linda E. be Gettin’ That Paper

Linda was always my favorite of the ’90s Supermodels. Those cheekbones. That pout. I believe it was photographer Steven Meisel who once said, “Every inch of that creature’s body has line.”

And now her billionaire Baby Daddy won’t pay up. Yes, if you have read much lately you know Francois-Henri Pinault of the Pinault Group- a man who breakfasts in ivory towers and plops his fanciness on platinum-plated toilets- won’t pay his child support. At least child support in Linda’s eyes. Remember, this is the woman who famously said in “Vogue” she wouldn’t get out of bed for less than $10,000. Well, if your baby daddy is a billionaire that ditched you for Salma Hayek, then maybe that sounds about right. I am Team Linda anyway simply because she was the opening model in “Too Funky” by George Michael back in 1872 or thereabouts.

How great is her life? I would like a man to even to take me to Long John Silvers and buy me some hush puppies (YUM), or on a special date to Olive Garden for their delicious breadsticks. And this ho basically wants 50k a month for a kid who ain’t even done with “Thomas the Tank Engine.” She is not even in the 1%, she is like on Mount Olympus or something. I can’t hate though, I love Linda, and want her to majorly bring in the Benjamins. And then take me to get some hush puppies, ’cause no guy in San Francisco does, and I’m hungry. Enjoy yourself some “Freedom” by George Michael featuring Linda below. Photo by Getty Images.

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